Cool Story, Tell it Again?

bagellie:

benefits of being friends with me

  • shitty jokes whenever you ask for them
  • shitty jokes whenever you don’t ask for them
lesserjoke:

The one on the right looks so upset about this development.

lesserjoke:

The one on the right looks so upset about this development.

radsturbate:

marry someone who has a different favorite cereal than u so they wont eat all of urs

stunningpicture:

Today I saw the single most shocking thing I have seen in my entire life

stunningpicture:

Today I saw the single most shocking thing I have seen in my entire life

substiel:

Some guy just whistled at me while driving by and my dad goes “don’t worry, that was for me”

Come lay with me. I wanna talk about nothing with someone that means something.
(via whatalovelythought)

leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

pudus:

dont ask me about 2009

sextradite:

ridge:

IM REALLY TIRED OF PARENTS THINKING THAT EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET IS A PREDATOR 

ikr wanna meet up and talk about it so where do you live?

stoned-levi:


that settles it
we have to get rid of the ocean

stoned-levi:

that settles it

we have to get rid of the ocean

tympanista:

loud music should be a thing in public restrooms i don’t like hearing people pee

listoflifehacks:

scoutblu:

starrypier:

MUG CAKE: 5TH ATTEMPT

DID IT JUMP OUT OF THE CUP

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

listoflifehacks:

scoutblu:

starrypier:

MUG CAKE: 5TH ATTEMPT

DID IT JUMP OUT OF THE CUP

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

intergalacticbarbie:

Time is a cruel unforgiving mistress

intergalacticbarbie:

Time is a cruel unforgiving mistress